As we're listening to the DJ on the radio spout out trivial factoids:
Al: "Hey, I learned something yesterday! "
Mom (bites tongue)
Al: Did you know that 80% of the lipstick women put on gets digested?
Me: No way, cant be that much.
Al: Yup. Why do women wear lipstick anyway?
Me: To make our lips pretty colors.
Al: Do y'all want your intestines to be pretty colors, too?
It’s us, but in dead animal form. But not really dead because they weren’t ever alive. Undead? No. That makes them sound like vampires. So not that. Fuck. I don’t know the word. Hey, how long can a title be? Because this seems excessive. Someone should stop me. Jesus. This is as bad as 280-character twitter.
9 hours ago