Backlog of blog fodder

A. "Standing O" for J.J.&T. Rock Band




B. Package of fruit cake on a hand-painted parrot, odd-shaped serving dish. Now that is a "white elephant" if I ever saw one!


C. Parent says "No," Gman says, "I not be happy!"


D. Guess who is not a morning person.



E. Princess walked up to me and said "I look great!"
(that's pink gloves, a headband, scrunchy worn as a bracelet, and a clutch)



F. I think it may be time to invest in a new pair of jeans.

We have returned...

...but it will be an eternity before the house returns to normal.
Our Christmases are always a "hurry up and go" affair to do presents, get Al to/from his father, & rush out the door to get to Craig's family, which is a 3 hr drive.

Kids first wake up (actually, we had to wake up the little ones up)
At the top of the stairs before going down:


Santa brought us a "Family gift" this year. Al sees it:


Santa brought Gman bedding for "a big boy bed." We are now a crib-free home!


Papaw plays "pool" on the new Wii.

Note the destruction?! That's not even the half of it....it will be spring before I see the carpet.

Santa Claus is Comin' to Town

We went driving around looking at Christmas lights over the weekend. One of the fire departments does a huge display where the lights turn on/off in unison to Christmas songs played on the radio. Luckily, Santa just happened to be there so we went in to save standing in line at the mall the next day. How lucky was that!? This is the closest the little ones would get to Santa, and only under the protection of Daddy. Princess refused to speak to him, even from 20 feet away, & Gman refused to even look at Santa!

From our house to yours,

Merry Christmas to all
and
to all a Good Night!

CSI: KY

Princess and Gman have crayons that are specially designed for using on bathtub surfaces, but the color tends to run quickly when it gets wet. Apparently they were going through an "artiste's red period" when they drew this. These pics don't really do them justice as to the magnitude of the runnage and amount of red! Believe me when I say, the tub looked like a gruesome scene out of a crime show!

Car of Dr. Suess?

Would you could you in a box?
Would you could you with a fox?

How about both?

I stand corrected

I mentioned my post about the coke machine credit card to some friends. They agreed with those that posted here...that they would use it for the convenience too. Which I agree--it IS convenient and for that reason I stand corrected. But I still think far more people would use it (not because they don't have any cash on them, but because they have no cash period) and would carry that coke on a balance for months/years making a $1.25 soda cost them $125!

Memory Lane Monday (#12))

At a Christmas party in 2004. Al is 8, Princess is 8 months, Gman was not yet even a twinkle in our eyes (but was a few weeks later!).

What in the world?

OK, it's obviously a credit card machine. But the location of it made Al and I really question the money decision-making skills of those who use it (and I hope it's not any of you because I don't want to offend). If someone can't scrape together $1.25 in cash, perhaps they should consider using the FREE water fountain that was 20 feet to the left instead.

When Decorations Go Bad

I found both of these down the street on Tuesday....tsk tsk tsk

No one listened when Santa warned "Be careful playing those Reindeer Games or somebody's gonna get hurt."


It appears that Frosty had a little too much eggnog at the company Christmas party.

Sound Financial Advice

I just randomly decided to go to the car wash this morning. Normally, I would be slightly peeved to have it rain on my car just 3 hours later. But the divine intervention that sent me there, so that I would see the Today Show's expert guest while waiting for my van, it has filled me with a warm fuzzy feeling that cannot blemish my attitude like the rain has blemished my van. His advice will be the simplest financial plan to follow, literally everyone can do it! I feel I am depriving you of the seriousness of the discussion since I cannot quote the guest verbatim, but I am pretty close: In today's economy it is important to invest in a good wine glass to maximize your wine experience.

Speaking in French

Don't get me wrong, in my brain I'm speaking in English. I DO NOT parlez-vous French. (I just now had to search online how to spell that!) That is how little of French I know. But apparently, when I am talking to my children, what I think I am saying in English is coming out in French, because they often seem to not understand me. Today, while grocery shopping, Gman kept screaming to hear his voice echo thru the rafters. I said "Stop it" and Princess immediately turns to Gman and translates: "Stop it means keep doing that."

Title Conundrum

I've mentioned to you all before the little road game we play called "Purple Car."

Princess learned the game "Slug bug" from her Grandma. Problem was, for the longest time, she couldn't tell the difference between a bug and a PT Cruiser. Now she can.

Gman and Princess have started yelling "Christmas lights" every time they see them.

Princess decided she wanted a game called "Box" where you yell "box" every time you see a vehicle that is even remotely rectangular in shape--ie ALL SUV'S, semi's, vans, etc.

Until I tell them "NO MORE!," every 2.5 seconds, somebody from the backseat (usually Princess) yells:

Box!
Purple Car!
Christmas lights!
Bug!
Protein Cruiser!

When I was trying to pick a title for this post, I couldn't decide between "Road Hazards" and "Snatching Myself Bald"

Do the hokey pokey & turn yourself around

Gman was dressing himself and came running into my bathroom to show me that he put on his pants. They were on backwards, so I tell him "Take them off, turn them around and put them back on."

He pulls them down to his ankles and starts spinning himself around and pulls them back up!!

Thats what
its
all
about!

Memory Lane Monday (#12)

Recall back in March, I did a post about boys and their water "experiments." (I'll wait for you to read it or else the rest of this post loses some of its je-ne-sais-quoi).

Al has outgrown them for the most part. I've not seen a water experiment in his bathroom for quite awhile. Wait. "Outgrown" isn't the right word....its really more that he's evolved to a new level of experimentation. Last week, I found this in the freezer:

It's a rock. Frozen in water. To see if the rock would somehow change by being frozen.

Ironically, the EXACT SAME DAY that I found the rock in the freezer, Craig found this:


It's Gman's Matchbox cars water experiment, found under the dining table.
Yes, there is water in there. Craig calls it a Hot Wheels Car Wash. It's even in the EXACT SAME type of cup as Al's frozen rock!

Dear Lord, please give me strength to get thru another 10 years of water experiments.

Mathematically speaking

For those of you who don't know....I used to teach math before becoming a Stay @ Home Mom. I've developed an equation for a phenomenon that all mom's are familiar with:

CCT = 1,000,000 x CDT

where CCT= "Child's Cleaning Time" and CDT= "Child's Destruction Time"
But no one has ever cracked the code as to WHY does this phenomenon exist.
I'VE DONE IT!!!!! I now know WHY it takes the child sooooo much longer to clean up than it did to destroy: When you ask said child to pick up their toys, as soon as you look away, they do it using chopsticks!

Giving Thanks

There are so many people and things to be thankful for this year. Our family has had hard times in the last 2 months with the passing of 2 truly great people. I think that makes me want to cherish what we have all the more. I am so very thankful for all the family, friends, neighbors and some near strangers who helped us thru those first weeks. I honestly don't know how we would have made it without each and every one of them. Some how, everyone knew what we would need and when we would need it...from big things like babysitting at the funerals, all the way down to the loaf of bread that I forgot to pick up at the grocery, & not yet an hour later there one was...just handed to me from the blue along with dinner, without my even saying I had forgotten it. Or just letting me privately vent via some incredibly long text messages (and amusingly disturbing ones at that).

I am thankful for my parents. They provide so much love and support and friendship.
I am thankful for my children. Even with all their quirks, attitudes and sometimes overwhelming issues, they are my everything. I live and breathe for them.
And I am thankful for all those who remain quietly in the background, but they're there if I need them.
But ever in the forefront is Craig. Always providing whatever our family needs. Whatever I need. Holding my hand, sometimes to pull me forward, sometimes to reel me back in. Loving me even when I don't listen, thinking "I told you so" but almost never saying it. I cannot imagine life without him. I hope I never have to.

The Joke to Nowhere

On November 5th, Al apparently was trying to play a practical joke on us. I noticed the socks up there the instant I walked in the room that night to go to bed. Funny thing is, he's never asked about it, and we've not said anything to him either. The prank that never was?

Is there a problem, Officer?

Me? Speeding?


But I couldn't have been going that fast! My feet don't even reach the floor. See?!


Yes, that is a GIANT balloon in his hand.

Frugality at it's shiniest

Has our economy gotten so bad that Kellogg's predicts we'll split up a box of Poptarts to make individual gifts?

Me & my old blue jeans

I've never had Princess try on jeans at the store before. I've always been able to guess at the size. But now she is transitioning from toddler to lil' girls clothes, so I thought it best. When I got them on her, I said, "Look at them in the mirror to see what you think." She turned to the mirror
and IMMEDIATELY did this little number!!

I was too busy laughing hysterically (hence the poor photo quality), but after showing the pic to Craig and Al, they figured out what she was thinking when she did it. This is a Hannah Montana pose! FYI--the title of this post is a Hannah Montana/Miley Cyrus song. It's actually not a bad song, I think.

2008 First Snow in KY

It was just a dusting, but Sunday marked our first "wake up to snow" for the season!

Knock Knock, more thereof

Gman & Princess were telling rapid fire Knock-Knock jokes in the back seat. Really bad ones. Literally a dozen+ of them. Somewhere in the middle:

Princess: Knock Knock
Gman: Who's there?
Pr: Bell
(silence)
Pr (frustrated voice): A bell, like "ring the bell"
Gman (excitedly yells): DING DING DING!

Of course, Mommy laughing at that one made it get repeated 3 more times.

Stingy Mom

Mother & child conversation:

Al: Whining-blah-blah-blah. Why can't I have prescription sunglasses? Whining-blah-blah-blah
Me: You got $300?
Al (deadpan voice): You need to spend more money on your kids.

SBB & the BBS

That stands for "Sweet Baby Boy and the Boo-Boo Stick"

Prefaces:
A. Sweet Baby Boy = Gman
B. Boo-Boo Stick = We used to have some sports bottles with these freezer sticks that snap inside to keep drinks cold. No longer have the bottles, but the sticks were really handy to use for lunches, etc, so we kept those. After the little ones were toddlers, they started getting used for the bumps and bruises of toddlerhood. Henceforth being called "boo-boo sticks"
C. I get migraines 2-3 times a month. I usually keep my eyes covered during one

Story:
Yesterday, I got a fast, raging migraine. After a while, Gman comes into the room and says, "Here Mommy, I bring this make you feel better." (Even in my haze of pain, I instantly think "I can't wait to tell Craig and the speech therapist he had a 9 word sentence! He rarely ever gets over 5.) I uncover my face to see him holding out a boo-boo stick. That's my Sweet Baby Boy!!!

Asleep vs Not Asleep, part 2

Getting Gman to go to sleep can be a real odyssey sometimes. If we leave the room before he's asleep, he most often gets out and plays, but we do frequently find him in places other than his bed. We've found him asleep on the floor, asleep in our bed, awake in our bathroom, awake under the dining table downstairs (all bedrooms are upstairs).

ASLEEP (didn't even flinch when I turned on the light for the pic)



NOT ASLEEP (that's him hiding behind the vacuum)

All About Craig

I totally stole this from Andrea and QB. Been meaning to do it for awhile, just busy with other stuff. Now would be a good time though---I miss him so much and have been thinking about him all day, but have several more hours to go before he gets back home.

1. He’s sitting in front of the TV: what is on the screen? a Poker tourney show of some sort
   
2. You’re out to eat. What kind of dressing does he get on his salad? None--he likes salad "dry"
   
3. What is one food he doesn’t like? marshmallows
   
4. You go out to the bar. What does he order? Maker's Mark & Coke
   
5. Where did he go to high school? Leslie County KY
   
6. What size shoe does he wear? 10 1/2
   
7. If he was to collect anything, what would it be? State quarters
   
8. What is his favorite type of sandwich? I think it's called a Philly Cheese Steak...???
   
9. What would the Husband eat every day if he could? Banana pudding!!!
   
10. What is his favorite cereal? Probably Froot Loops
    
11. What would he never wear? a polo with stripes on it, dear Lord, he'll wear a rose colored one, but heaven forbid there be stripes.
    
12. What is his favorite sports team? UK Basketball
    
13. Who will he vote for? John McCain
    
14. Who is his best friend? ME!
    
15. What is something you do that he wishes you wouldn’t do? leave 1/2 empty Diet Coke cans every where (although I have gotten much better about that)
    
16. How many states has he lived in? 2
    
17. What is his heritage? Eastern Kentucky
    
18. You bake him a cake for his birthday; what kind? About any flavor, just make it in a Bundt pan
    
19. Did he play sports in high school? yes, basketball
    
20. What could he spend hours doing? time with me & 3 kiddos, or playing poker
    

Memory Lane Monday (#11)

I found this pic today. In it he appears to be 4' 3.5" almost exactly 4 years ago. Ironically, we measured his height just last week---5' 2.5"
He's grown exactly 11 inches in 4 years!!

Santa & police informants

Craig scored some tix to the UK Basketball game last night. Al and I were the lucky attendees. We had a total blast! UK doesn't just play a game--these are like major league sporting events with shows and fireworks during the player intro's.


The cheerleader and mascot pyramid are a crowd favorite (click on it to see a larger view. That flag is actually about 10 ft tall.):

But at this game, Al and I were mostly fascinated by the fact that

SANTA IS A UK FAN!!!

My walk-by photo at half-time wasn't so good. Toward's the end of the game we scooted down. Here's Al's "pretend to take a picture of me" photo (He's sooo hooked on the blog now!)


But after that, I got a pretty great one!


After the game, Al had just gotten in bed and could hear voices outside. Turns out, teenagers were stealing pumpkins from the neighbor's porch. The neighbor who is a policeman...who's cell phone number I have...who just happened to be on patrol only a few blocks from the house. He called me back to say he drove around and found them and watched them take pumpkins from 4 more houses before pulling them over and lining them up on the sidewalk. I asked Neighbor Policeman to take a pic for the blog, but he declined. Al and I are now officially police informants.
Al is totally stoked! Says this was the best day ever!

Laundry Pocket Pull

I rarely ever check pockets when doing laundry. Mostly because I just thoroughly enjoy opening the dryer to find a really great surprise, it's like I'm a contestant on Let's Make a Deal. Some days it's a dollar, or a Matchbox car, or rocks. Some days its an exciting trip! Such as a trip to the mall to replace the 5 pairs of jeans that got a bad case of Red Chapstick Measles. I have always reserved the right to keep anything I wanted that came thru the laundry---think of it as my payment for services rendered (that & it was usually mine anyways).

Today I reached into the laundry hamper and got jabbed with a pencil from Al's pocket. Hence a little game of Pocket Pull!

What do I do with 3 pencils, a pair of earbuds, a plastic bracelet, and a giant ball of fuzzy lint that is 85% red, 5% green, 5% yellow 5% purple? I'm thinking I don't really want to know the story behind the fuzzy lint. And I'm going to have to give him the 7th grade "Industrial Arts" teacher talk about the perils of guys keeping pencils in their front pockets.

Knock Knock

Princess goes in & out of a Knock-Knock joke phase. It used to be a random word paired with another word, example: Chicken. Chicken who? Chicken fork

This occurred in the van not too long ago:
Princess: Knock Knock
Me: Who's there?
Pr: Guess
Me: guess who?
Pr: Guess we have to get some gas. Funny! Get it?
Gman: Knock Knock
Me (thinking "Great. Now I've got 2 kids telling bad knock knock jokes")
Princess: Who's there?
Gman: Funny. Get it?
Princess: No! It wasn't funny.

Vote Responsibly

Just a reminder for you to go vote today! Please THINK about your vote. I personally don't think highly of "straight-ticket voting" (its naive to think that your particular party only has the best of people in it). Nor do I believe in voting for someone solely because your spouse/parents did. Sometimes, spouses/parents are wrong. So please make an informed decision. If you don't vote, you give up your right to complain for the next 4 years! ;-)

Where Craig grew up, the "vote for so&so" signs for local offices are usually hand painted. This one hangs above the road on a telephone line and may very well be the best political sign ever. (Click on it to enlarge it to read what it says. I did do a little touch up to make it more readable, but I, in no way, changed the content.) I must admit, I've been pondering for weeks, "Is he implying that his opponent is not sober, or letting people know that he's now dry?" Please keep your comments nice....we have family there.
:-)

Backlog of blog fodder

I've got a ton. Here's just a few.....in random order:

A. As I returned from Andrea's, I stopped for gas and saw this sign in front of the gas station. Be afraid, be very very afraid:


B. I'm at Sam's, picking out a package of beef when I hear Gman say behind me "1..2..3..4..5..Ready Not, Here come. (pause) There you are!" As I turn around, I hear Princess doing the same thing. Then Gman immediately does it again. "1..2..3..Ready Not, Here come. THERE YOU ARE!!" Even more bizarre is that he acted genuinely surprised to find her sitting next to him in the cart!!



C. Gman's new winter coat:

But what is this? A grab handle for mom to snatch him by the back of his head...??



D. Snuggly guys on the couch.



E. For Jenn, License plate: J33PER on a Jeep



F. A new fire department was built near my neighborhood. Their main fire engine pulled into the grocery store the other day while I was there. What? Is that # 22? Why yes, it is!